Popular Marriage Counsellor / Author and the Founder of Courtship Academy took to her social media page to share 7 Lessons she has learnt in 35years of Marriage . Read below;
One of my greatest achievements in life is having the marriage I wanted.
Meeting my heartthrob, Vidal, who also had crazy ideas of what he wanted in marriage made it possible.
We were both willing to smash the acceptable rules and norms of marriage to create our own unique union.
35 years after, we bask in it, with no regrets whatsoever.
Here are the 7 lessons I learned in our 35 years love journey.
1. You hold the power to decide who you want as a spouse. Never ever release it to anyone regardless of who they are.
2. You decide the rules that will run your marriage, not the society or culture. Your marriage is unique to you, design it the way you want with apologies to no one. Just ensure you're with the right person.
3. It's not about the tribe but about the values and beliefs of who you want to marry.
4. In-laws have little to do with the success of your marriage. Don't refuse to marry a man simply because his family doesn't like you. Instead find out the stance of your man when it comes to his people. If he is not willing to stand up for and with you against all odds (including his family), then he might not be the one for you.
5. If you can't submit to each other while in courtship, you wouldn't in marriage. Hey, why bother marrying the person? If your opinions are trash to your intended, why do you think they will become gold in marriage?
6. Don't be deceived, if your educational levels are like night and day, it may destroy your union except you're committed to make it work. How does this person fit into your life in 5, 10, 15 or more years?
7. People generally don't change in marriage. That's why you need to do your due diligence to know the person in Courtship. Boldly address anything not sitting well with you during courtship because it will not change after marriage.
May these guide your footsteps as you search for that special person with whom you want to create your own unique union.
Photo design courtesy of Marie-gisele Lawson of Uni-Ife Law '83.
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